Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Step-Monster is a Two-Way Street

I'm sure that there are times when my defacto step-son does not like me and wishes I'd never come into his world. Yet, every once in a while, we have 'moments' where it seems that he actually likes and respects me. I thought we had made great strides -- until tonight when I got 100% teenage attitude and sass. Granted, I've only been a part of his life for five months, but in that time, I have gone out of my way to help him with school -- science project, senior project, English project... all out of my pocket and out of the goodness of my heart... and out of a genuine desire to see him do well.

When I was a teenager, I never understood my dad's 'melodrama' (my perception) of saying, "after everything I've done for you, this is the thanks I get..." Now I do. While I cannot imagine the hurt of having your own flesh and blood dismiss you and treat you with total disrespect, I can say that it didn't feel too great coming from my step-monster either. I wonder how the next 6 months will play out as he continues to flex his 'indepedence' muscles... and I wonder what the effect will be on my relationship with his dad.

1 comment:

Timestep said...

First - nice to see you updating again. Things in my life have gone pear shaped so I've not been commenting the way I usually do....

But, this struck a cord with me.

I was that snippy teenager with a step-father. I was the one who lashed out.

One day, my father looked at me (yes, he was more father than my other one) and said that he was not allowing *me* to ruin his relationship with my mother - his wife.

25 or so years later, that still sticks with me. That his commitment to my mother would not be shaken by my teenage antics. That my mother was worth fighting for.

Anyway, teens are going to be trouble and lash out. It's just a bit harder when the relationship is so new.